Wednesday, May 18, 2016

Give Me a Break

There is an old saying that states “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”. I'm willing to bet we've all disagreed with this at some point, and especially when it comes to diabetes. Many advocate for the importance of using non-stigmatizing, inclusive and non-judgmental language when speaking about or to people with diabetes. For some, they don't care, others care passionately. Where do you stand when it comes to “person with diabetes” versus “diabetic”, or “checking” blood sugar versus “testing”, or any of the tons of other examples? Let's explore the power of words, but please remember to keep things respectful.


I have been freakishly lucky when it comes to responses about my diabetes. It's true that I don't appreciate the sugar jokes and that I've occasionally had to stand up for Type 2 diabetes (Uhhhhh...that's actually the one that does have a genetic component...it's not a "lifestyle choice"). But there's only one thing that really gets my goat when it comes to language around diabetes and that's three small words:

"I could never."

I know that it's often meant to be a compliment, in a weird way. It's intended as a sign of respect for me and my diabetes and what this person assumes is my daily battle. But to me it implies such impunity. Or maybe it simply reminds me of me 2 years ago when I was busy pretending nothing was wrong as I hobbled around with perma-heartburn and an even more perma-sweet tooth. Maybe I feel jealous of people who really think that things like this can't happen to them. 

Because guess what kiddo? You could never (ever?). You could and you would and you know what else? You'll be damn happy to do it because it beats the alternative. There really is no other alternative, to be honest. I know that I'm a brave person. I have traveled and lived on multiple continents and I have climbed mountains and faced emotions and read scary books and stood in front of classrooms full of foreign children. Maybe you "could never" do that and that's cool and I don't mind hearing about that. 

But don't act like me pricking my finger (without even looking) in front of you is something you respect. It's something you're scared of. When you say "I could never," what I hear is "I hope I never," and that's unfair and upsetting because I wish I had the luxury of hoping this never happened to me. 





6 comments:

  1. Great post. Admittedly, I was one of those people who thought like that before I was diagnosed. It's amazing what we find we can do when there's no alternative. Now, hearing those words just annoy me to no end. Thanks for sharing.

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    1. Thanks Mike! Yeah me, too...I think that's why it's the hardest to hear....I'm probably jealous!

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  2. I remember once... just after my son was diagnosed (at 3 years of age) a 60 year old man told me he'd rather die than have to endure finger pokes and shots. Ugh.

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    1. Ugh indeed! I hope your son wasn't listening...he is going to grow up so resilient and strong thanks to this!! And with way more empathy :)

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  3. Glad you tackled this aspect of language and diabetes. My response to "I could never" and other statements like it is always, "You'd be amazed what you could do to stay alive."

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    1. Exactly! It also feels like such a dead end...I prefer it when people have questions and are curious so we can have a discussion!

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